The Girl and the Ghost of Her Childhood

Dear Me

There are pieces of us that still breathe inside the shadows of our childhood. The girl who learned to brace for impact. The girl who tried to earn love like it was a reward for perfect behavior. The girl who carried the weight of a home shaped by violence, silence, and the kind of unspoken generational trauma that lingers even when you grow older.

You survived a childhood built on fear and expectations. A childhood where innocence had no room to grow. You learned early that love could be loud and unpredictable and often painful. You learned to read the room before you could read a book. You learned to make yourself small so others could feel big. This is the story of a child who became a woman shaped by memory, anxiety, and the long slow work of inner child healing.

You were never the problem. You were a child in a storm you did not create.

For years you tried to outrun what happened. You tried to be the girl who pleased everyone.

You poured your heart into the wrong people hoping they would fill the emptiness that your family never could. You confused attention with love. You mistook chaos for passion. You pulled away from the ones who were gentle because gentleness felt unfamiliar. You were afraid of being truly seen, unsure how to receive safety when you had only known survival.

PTSD, anxiety, bulimia, and depression moved in quietly. They became roommates you never invited but somehow learned to tolerate. The pain lived under your skin, whispering stories that were never yours to carry. This was not weakness. It was a response to childhood trauma that never had space to be spoken. Yet you kept going even when you felt like disappearing. You held on through every moment you thought you would break.

My dear younger self, you did your best with what you knew. You protected me with the only tools you had. You built walls when you needed shelter. You pushed people away when you feared losing them. You kept me alive through every season where healing felt impossible.

Thank you for that. But now it is my turn to take the lead. I am ready to choose a life that does not revolve around old wounds. I am ready to let go of beliefs that convinced us we were unworthy. I am ready to rewrite the story and step into emotional healing with a softer voice. I am ready to heal the present and the future with the love you never received. This is where recovery begins and where the woman I became steps forward for both of us.

You can rest now. You no longer have to carry the burden alone. I promise to build a life that honors you. A life where peace is not a stranger. A life where love is not earned through suffering. A life where memories are gentle and safe and full of color. A life where the inner child is not hidden but held. You were always enough. You are still enough. You will always be enough.

With love
The woman you grew into